(Trigger Warning: contains themes of loss, death, grief, suicide, terrorism)

As many of you will know, it’s been a rough five years. During the loss and the heartache of it all, I’ve learned a lot about myself and the world, but here are two things I now know for sure.

1. I am resilient as hell.
2. Sometimes resilience isn’t enough.

Losing my sister to suicide, two cousins in a terrorist attack, and both my grandparents really took a toll on my emotional load. But it was losing my mother to pancreatic cancer earlier this year that made me realise just how much I had been carrying. It had been a brutal five years and I had just been pushing through, but it was time to stop and rest. It’s so easy to burn out, to push yourself and just plough through. But it isn’t healthy.

Returning to work after losing Mum hit differently, and it became very apparent just how empty my cup was. Teaching in general is one thing and requires so much emotional energy, but teaching special needs is that much more, and I was at emotional capacity.

And so I resigned from my teaching post (with a view to go back in the future) and decided to maybe do some charity work, or a part-time 9-5 where I could leave work behind at the end of the day. The goal was to have a healthier work/life balance, if such a thing exists! But then a friend reminded me how I always talked about taking a sabbatical when I reached ten years of teaching and suggested that maybe I just do it now instead.

After losing my sister, I have tried hard to advocate for smashing the stigma when it comes to mental illnesses and championing the importance of looking after your mental health. I realised I’d be a bit of a hypocrite if I didn’t do this for myself. So I decided to take my friend’s advice; take an extended mental health break, take a huge step back, and engage in some excursion therapy while I travel the world in an attempt to heal.

So yes, in a way, this could be my midlife crisis; but at least I haven’t bought a really expensive car, and I haven’t got sucked into investing in cryptocurrency! Hopefully through this adventure I will refill my cup, learn more about myself, learn more about this big old world around me, and remind myself that there is actually beauty in it.

So come and join me on this journey – both my literal and my healing one!

Updates will come when I have Wi-Fi and motivation!

Much Love,
Sara 💛